New Experiences....Old Style...(Part 1 of ?)

Hundreds of years ago when a building needed to be built. Neighbors all got together and it was done. While the men worked, the women would be off to the side making sure that there was enough food to feed the hungry masses. Horses pulled wood, and men used handsaws and measuring tapes to cut pieces of wood. There were no power tools to break the serenity of the moment with their high pitched whine. Larger pieces would be assembled on the ground and then raised into position using the man power at hand. This is something that I would have like to see. Man working with man to accomplish a common goal. Once again, thanks to a great friend, I was able to experience something as close to this as we could get these days.

The sun rose early and hot on the morning of May 26, 2012. I knew as the kids and I left the house at 7:30 that it was going to be a scorcher. Aeryn, Alex and I were headed to meet up with Jay, Lilly, and Kira for breakfast before we headed out for the Long View Farm Barn Raising. Jay had been toiling away for months in the top of his father's barn getting beams notched and cut to fit together in an elaboration jigsaw puzzle of framework that would turn in to a barn to be used as a landing spot for hay and sleigh-rides. We had watched him along the way. It was such an awesome process! I had never seen anything like that done before. 

Breakfast was wonderful, but all too soon it was time to start gathering supplies and heading down to where Jay had already built the floor. Jay headed to his dad's barn to get some things with the truck, Lilly, Alex, Aeryn and I started walking down the road to feed cows along with way. And Kira took the four wheeler. Along the way Kira asked if Aeryn could jump on the back of the four wheeler. How could I possibly deny that pleading look my child gave me? Off she flew leaving Lilly, Alex and I to feed cows. It was okay. Lilly had not gotten the chance to play with them anyway. 

Before long the four of us were standing around the barn looking at it. Soon more friends arrived. With the arrival of Med, Mo, and their beautiful dog Dixie (who did a great job of keeping McKinley company), the first and second pieces were lifted into place.....

Okay so if only it were that easy. I have much respect for anyone who still builds this way. Seriously I will be the first to admit that I had NO CLUE what I was doing. However, I take direction well, and that is how I spent my day. Before Med and Mo arrived we had this wonderful idea of trying to do it ourselves. I am al for "girl power" but there was NO WAY that three women and Jay, who happens to be a reasonably strong guy, were lifting this first piece. Aeryn however was able to get a couple of nice pictures that show that we made a really good attempt!

It was a GREAT attempt. It just was not happening. I had no idea how we were going to get this giant thing that weight about 500lbs into the air in an upright position without killing someone. Before the lift Jay pointed out all of the "danger zones". Coincidentally we all seemed to be standing directly in them. However, I had faith in the ability of man to work together as a cohesive team. That was my mantra throughout the day..."man is a cohesive team". I would like to think that it worked. 

However after Mo and Med arrived it really did go up much easier. With no casualties! It was a pretty proud moment seeing it standing vertically. I felt sure that it was anchored and braced safely because I let Aeryn climb into this picture as my replacement for the lifting crew. Though I am looking at it now and realizing that Mo is not in there either. That's okay there were plenty of great photo ops throughout the day and Mo was in quite a few of them. 

 I know what you are thinking...It is absolutely beautiful! Of course that is what you were thinking. I looked at this lone piece standing there for a long time and could not fathom how this structure was going to turn into a barn It is a testament to shear intelligence. As much as Jay would like to take the credit for that intelligence, I am sure, I give it to the guy who invented the post and beam style stucture. Who looks at a tree and says "Oh, if I make cuts here, here and here and put the pieces together like so, I have a building!"? Really? Who thinks like that? Certainly not this girl. I see a tree and I think "oooh pretty....."

 Now here is the other thing that you are thinking...That all of these pieces are held together with a bunch of really strong nails and glue. Nope! Each piece is specially designed to take into account weight and force, and is held together by wooden pegs. No nails!?! Another moment of genius for the post and beam guy.

Up goes the second piece. By this time we were feeling like pros! There is an amazing sense of accomplishment when it comes to making something like this with your own hands. But I can not imagine what it would have been like to do this out of necessity. Now people have the help of so many technological advances to do the job for them. When we want a barn we call some people and they take some prefabricated panels and stick them together and call it a day. There is no heart or soul to a prefabricated building.



The process was longer. The work was harder, but I think the end result is going to be well worth it. I guess you will just have to wait and see.....

The Greatest Man...

Lately I have been thinking a lot about my father. Simple little things remind me of him all the time. Listening to this song in the car the other day. And today hearing the strains of big band music filtering in the resource room windows. I had an amazing father and still love him dearly. I wish he could be here to see what wonders my children and Evelyn's children have become. He has been gone almost ten years and so many things have happened that he would be proud of.

But I guess the real reason for me to think about him was the phone call that I received the other day. It was not about my father, but about Alex's. I have promised myself that I would never be negative about the father of either of my children and in this post I am going to honor and stay true to that. However, his best friend called me the other day to get my reaction to his coming back to the area. 

Honestly, it is not something that I ever thought I would have to think about. And I can not honestly say how I will feel. I truly loved him at one point, and would love for him to be a part of his son's life. But not if it is going to cause any kind of drama. My children do not need drama. I honestly do not understand how the parents with shared custody handle it. I could not imagine spending any time away from my children and I guess this is what scares me the most. In the past year and a half I have spent very few nights away from my children. As a matter of fact I think that the only time that have been separated from Alex was the night that I spent in the hospital. How will I handle it if Ryan chooses to press for visitation and taking Alex over night?

The other thing that I fear is either of my children feeling like they are unloved. I was adopted when I was younger. Which means that raising me was a choice. Someone CHOSE to love me. And there was never a moment growing up where I ever doubted the love of my parents. Even when we did not always agree. How can I guarantee that my children will always feel the same way?

I guess this post is kind of a downer. Now the happiness that I usually try to project. I guess we can not all be happy all the time. But do not doubt that my happiness is here. Thinking of my father DOES make me happy. There are so many memories that I have that he and I shared together.

We used to camp a lot. And I remember waking up early with him and walking down to the blueberry patch to pick berries for pancakes. I remember the turkeys that he used to roast in a hole in the ground. I remember the way he used to laugh. And his smile. Is it too much to want my children to have memories like these? 

How much wood.....

A couple of months ago I heard the term "Wood Bee" out of my friends mouth. He was apparently planning one and asked if I wanted to come. At the time I had no idea what he was talking about but he was perfectly patient in explaining what he had planned. He had been training his team of horses to haul logs out of the woods. So with the help of DAPNet, he wanted to bring together teams of horses to pull in logs to be cut, split and stacked to provide wood for a neighbor. How fabulous an idea was this!?! I was so impressed that without hesitation I said that I would be there. 

The couple that the wood was intended for are amazing people. The man, Ted, recently turned 84. I am pretty sure that he would have cut and split all this wood himself had we not had people volunteer to help. He just seems like that type of man. The kind that realizes that something needs to be done, and does it without hesitation. I had met them when I house sat for my friend over the summer. Ted and his wife Nancy, were so kind and welcoming of my children and I. Until then I had lived in a world where neighbors did not really care about neighbors. It was truly an eye opening experience.

On Saturday May 19, the kids and I woke up bright and early. Everyone was scheduled to be there at 9 so Aeryn and I wanted to make sure we were there early enough to get the cows fed and settled down. With that done we walked down to the horse pasture where we were sure people were going to be meeting. The back of the pasture was lined with stock trailers. There, being tacked up, were two teems of oxen, and three teams of horses. There was also a single horse, and I knew that Jay would also be going to get his own team too. All in all six teams and a single were going out into the woods today. It was an amazing site to see. 

Once everything got start it ran so smoothly I do not know how well I can describe it. The horses (and oxen) pulled in the logs to a landing that had been set up to process the wood. There a well equipped, (and well managed) team cut the logs, sorted between kitchen wood and furnace wood, and ran the furnace wood through the splitter before tossing it into the back of a waiting truck. When the trucks were full they were backed to the appropriate area where I was waiting with some children to unload and stack it all. The children were that of a local family that came to help as well as a few 4-H kids from Aeryn's group. 

It was such a tiring, amazing day. We managed to bring in 5 chords of wood! Most of it ended up being split and stacked, but there is still a bit left. 

I strolled through the cow pasture today. Where they had pulled the logs through. And you would never have known that they had been there had you not seen it for yourself. There were no noisy, smog making machines to tear up the earth that provides the grass for our cows. There was virtually no sign that anything out of the ordinary had happened. Honestly readers, if you ever need log work done around your yard, this is the way to go! Whenever I drive past an area that is being cleared I want to cry for the damage that is being done to our Earth. It also makes me wonder what damage is being done to our society. 

It was one of those times that makes me realize that it really does "take a village". Somewhere along the way we have lost our sense of community. We no longer help our neighbors and barely take heed to the fact that they may need a little extra help. When people are in trouble we lock our doors, and hide behind our curtains as we nosily try to find out exactly what is going on. How did our society as a whole get this way?

This is not the way that I want my children raised. I want them to know that it is okay to help those in need. If more people were willing to put in a hard days work to help one another, we would not have the time nor the energy for all of the bickering and squabbling going on. 

I would like to thank my friend, Jay for including me in this event. Never will I hesitate when I get invited to another. And I certainly hope that he plans more in the future....

Idle hands.....

What is that saying? "Idle hands are the devil's tools?" Something like that right? I am sorry if I misquoted. The hands of a working single mother are certainly never idle. Lately it seems that no part of me is idle. I go from work, to feed cows, to softball, and then eventually am able to get home. 

Softball season is one of my favorite seasons. (second only to soccer season) Aeryn loves to plan and this year she is lucky enough to have "King Paul" as her coach. She is very happy with this. It is only every other year that she gets to be on a sports team with Grace since they are in different grades at school. This is the year. I love watching her skills develop and it certainly makes the time and effort worth it to see her smile. 

April was such a busy month I hardly had time to keep up with coursework, let alone blog. Aeryn turned 10 at the end of the month. A HUGE milestone for me as a parent. It seems like only yesterday that I looked into her eyes for the first time. And yet here she is, hard headed, opinionated and obstinate, just like her mother.

Meanwhile on the Alex front...Boy is raising a little boy different than my little girl. It seems like every diaper change is turning into a wrestling match. Though he is showing and interest in using the potty so maybe potty training will come sooner than expected. I certainly hope so. He is also louder, messier and far more active that Aeryn ever was. Or maybe it just seems that way. It seems like he is always into something, or eating something that he shouldn't be eating. Everything is delicious to this little boy. 

And even with all of my griping. Life is good. There is nothing that makes me happier than spending time with my kiddos. I know that in the future they will be happy and well adjusted individuals. And no matter how busy they keep me, it makes every second worth it. These hands are certainly no tool for the devil.

Spring time...

Softball season has started, and this at least is a sport that I can enjoy. Unlike basketball, which I do not enjoy, and did not realize that my child had developed skill in until the very last game. I should have been paying closer attention. Having an athletic child leads to a very busy life. But it is all worth it. Aeryn is luck enough this season to be coached by her favorite uncle who she calls, King Paul . This also means that she gets to be on the same team as Grace. Which could lead to some drama later in the season but I certainly hope not.

The daylight is lasting longer and I find that Aeryn is having a harder time getting to bed on time because of the lasting daylight. She just wants to stay up and enjoy the daylight when really she should be getting rest for school the next day. It makes me happy that we are getting closer and closer to the end of the school year.

There are already so many things that we will have to fit in this summer. Aeryn will be participating in a summer school program to increase her reading fluency. Or if not increase it, at least to avoid the "summer slide". Though she is still a bit behind in her grade level reading wise she is coming along great now that we have narrowed down where the difficulties are. We will also be training animals all summer long and having lots of quality family time. I had wanted to fit in some camping this summer but it looks like the only camping that I will be doing is at cattle shows. Aeryn would really like to go to four but I do not know if we are going to be able  to fit them all in.

Life itself feels really good right now. My children are happy, and I believe that I am happy as well. We look forward to the coming holiday in which I will get to cook a big meal and we wills it and gorge ourselves until we can not move. I will get to run, jump, and play with the kids. Maybe even take our bikes out for a bit.

Accidental friendships....

I have come to realize that not all friendships are the same. They come in different shapes, colors and sizes. Some are easy to just toss away like a stinky pair of sneakers and others are like that stretched out comfy sweatshirt that you just cant get rid of. Some friendships are started with the conscious thought "How can I be friends with this person? I should be friends with this person". Usually this thought goes along with figuring out just what being friends with that person could get you. There are those friendships that happen because they are expected. And then there are my favorite kind of friendships. The accidental ones.

The accidental ones are those friendships that you had no intention of having. But turn out to be so much fun that you do not know what you would do without them. Feeling like you have known someone for years and imagining the things that you can do together for many years to come. Those are the friendships that I like best. Hopefully those people who I cherish this highly know who they are.

One of my friends is allowing me to achieve a goal for my children that I did not think possible. And my children are getting more out of this experience than I ever expected. I have always known that I wanted to raise my children in a rural setting, around people who cared not just for themselves but for those around them. I want them to have solid, strong role models. The kind that will teach my children to be fearless and that anything is achievable if you put your mind to it. No matter how many times I say these things they are never quite as believable as when they are said by someone else.

I am watching Aeryn turn into this amazing little girl. Not that she was not amazing before. But there is something different now. A month ago she was afraid of ladders, now she scrambles up the ladder into the hay loft without a seconds hesitation. She does not whine or complain when being asked to do something to get the pasture ready for her cows to come home. (Of course this could be because she gets to ride on the back of a 4-wheeler)

Tonight I watched her trek her way to the back of the horse pasture where Lee, Zeke, Spotty (I hope that is his name), Zack, and Lola are. She was not alone of course. Yet she is the one that I had my eyes on. She did not have a care in the world. I could tell that she was chatting away about something. Her little body bounced with every step she took. Then came the horses. She moved closer to her companion as the ground shook. The sound of hooves sounded like thunder rolling through the air. And then she turned and I could see the absolute joy on her face.

This really is the kind of life I want for my kids. To be surrounded by good people, fantastic animals. This is the place where dreams are made and achieved. With the right tools, anything is possible.

All because of an accidental friendship.

I speak for the trees....

Last night was fantastic! Thank you Evelyn and Paul for having an anniversary which provided me with another opportunity to hang out with two out of three of your children. (I would have loved to have had the third one there as well but he was camping)

I took Aeryn, AmberMae, Grace, and My mother to see The Lorax. We had been waiting for it to come to the cheap theater near home. I had been a little hesitant to see it as I believe that Dr. Seuss is just something that you do not mess with. (I was not really impressed with The Cat in the Hat). However I really enjoyed this movie. I also enjoyed the time with family.

AmberMae pointed out that they have spent three out of the last four weekends at my house. It has been great. I am hoping to get out today with the four kids and ride our bikes. Though as I look out the window now, it looks a little dark and gloomy. So, it may just be a movie day inside.

I am thinking about surprising them with pancakes when they wake up. Only I can not remember if they like pancakes. That could be problematic. I guess I will just wait a little while and see what happens.